prayers please..

[melchpeppi]

for my SIL who is right now having a c-section, after being diagnosed yesterday with pre-eclampsia at nearly 32wks :(. I am trying my hardest to send positive vibes, but Im so scared and worried for them.

She should have baby in her arms (well, as much as she can) by now - she went in at 11am.

Please light a candle and send positivity her way

[Mercurious]

You have my positive vibes. It's not the best way to be born, but emergencies happen, 8 weeks premmie these days isn't much. Prayers that your new little nephew/neice will be just fine and I hope she has a speedy recovery and lots of skin to skin time and that the breastfeeding relationship isn't affected.

[Madi]

Thinking of you all and sending some :vibes her way.

[Donna]

No news yet hun? I've been sending every positive thought I could since last night.

I have my candle lit.

Much love to you :heart:

[Ethereal]

Positive vibes from here, hon xo

[melchpeppi]

Still no news yet, its been nearly two hours - I know we arent on their minds right now, so Im going to assume that no news is good news and they are having some newborn snuggles right now.

[Merlion]

positive vibes from over here too. hope everything has gone well. 8 weeks premmie is not much nowadays. A friend had pre-eclampsia and her baby born was born at 32 weeks and he was a nice size of 5 pounds and as well enough to be with mummy after 2 days. lots of skin to skin contact is highly recommended

[Karena]

Lots of positive thoughts and vibes :)

[melchpeppi]

Thankyou everyone, they have held off on the c/s until tomorrow because she appears to have stablized. Thats good news isnt it?

[Stardust]

Yes that is good news. Love to you all xxx

[Rinelle]

That sounds like great news. Hope she continues to remain stable.

[Karena]

That's great news Mel, power of positive thinking, thoughts and vibes

[Hailstorm]

oh how scary!! She's very lucky to have someone like you in her life who will call upon all the powers she can to get her some universal help!! Here's hoping she stays stable and can maybe even birth naturally (I really don't know anything about pre eclampsia though)

[melchpeppi]

Im praying hard for that, she could possibly do it if she remains stable :D. I dont know anything about what the specialists/Drs are saying, whether it is even an option - nor do I know if she and BIL are open to it now, with this being so scary (and their first child and all).

[Nyree]

Hopefully, she everything will stay good & the c/s can be avoided **fingers crossed**

[cuddlefish]

I hope she remains stable and gets a chance to birth normally. How scary this must be for her.

[SungaiKecil]

FWIW I was 'babysat' through being prepped for theatre at 32 weeks, to eventually being caesared at 37. I had PE too.
Every day is a day for the baby to grow, mature, and strengthen.

The longer they can leave it in the better really, as long as her body holds out.

[mummabare]

sending lots of positive vibes their way..I can imagine they are very anxious.

[SeaStar]

more positive vibes are on their way.

[mrs fox]

:heart Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts into the night.
2 candles are now buning here 1 for your brother & SIL & the other for Baby!

[melchpeppi]

Thankyou so much :heart

Now, I haven't had to consider this before - do I keep my candle lit through the night?? Or send a blessing?

[cherish]

big hugs to your SIL, her babe and you! They will keep a good eye on her darling... Pre-eclampsia can be very dangerous for Mum and bub.. sending calm vibes to her!

[mrs fox]

I have kept the candles burning all night I just took them to the bedroom so I could keep and eye on them.
I am wishing your family a positive warm day today!

[sarah bean]

hope today is a good one for your family :D

[melchpeppi]

Thankyou, no news yet - so I guess that it must be ok? I kept the candle burning all night, and now have lit another :).

[Savannah]

Sending peaceful, healing vibes.

[Snoozie]

Glad the little one is getting to "cook" longer Mel.

Big hugs to you xxx

[Kathryn]

Positive vibes from here too Mel. :heart

[Pinky]

positive vibes sent.

[melchpeppi]

A little 4lb boy was just born, mumma and bub are doing ok I think - I dont really know any more than that but they are alive and hopefully well :)

Thankyou for the vibes everyone, it means alot to me :).

[cherish]

hey honey- congratualtions to your sister (and you!).. we will continue to send our positive vibes.. for mum and bub.. and especially for caring staff and a good LC!

[mrs fox]

Blessing to you and you SIL & new little babe.
I am going to continie my thoughts and my candle is now awaiting a name.
I am so happy that we were able to help.

Good things come to those who wait.....

[Hailstorm]

Congrats Aunty Mel!!! Hope all is well and Mum and bub are in enjoying milky bliss

[soulmama]

much love and healing to all hon. :heart :heart

[sarah bean]

yay them xxx <3

[sarah bean]

oh poo. um, :heart: ?

[Snoozie]

Thinking of your SIL/BIL and their new little bundle. Hope things are going well for them and you are reassured soon.

[SpringMumma]

Thinking of you Mel and your SIL, BIL and new nephew too. Here's hoping mum and bub are having wonderful milky cuddles.

[Karena]

Congrats on their little bundle. Hope they all stay safe :heart :heart

[Natenimiri]

Hey mel, sending prayers, positive energy, thoughts vibes - everything!
I always pray to Divine Mother that whatever is for the greatest good to happen. :angel:

[ali_celt]

Oh congratulations on the birth, I do hope everything is going fine!

[Stardust]

Congratulations! Hope mum and baby both recover quickly.

[Kathryn]

Congratulations! Lots of positive thoughts and best wishes. x

[Savannah]

Congrats. Will continue to keep sending healing and loving vibes.

[skn]

Congratulations! Thinking of you all.

[Joey]

Congratulations x

[Aine]

love and best wishes to them

[littlemissnaughty]

Congratulations Aunty mel. Sounds like he was better being out than in.

[melchpeppi]

THankyou :heart

His name is Jasper Alexander :D

He is in NICU and on just about everything that he can be. They didnt take any colostrum from SIL last night :(. Which is a little disappointing :(. Im hoping beyond hope they get that ball rolling today.

[Karena]

What a great name, I know other Jasper and he's just gorgeous.

I also hope that they get the colostrum for him soon.

I can now say welcome earthside little Jasper, may your life be full of love, friendships, happy times and lots of years :heart :heart

[cherish]

how is she feeling about breastfeeding? If it's something that she's wanting to do then perhaps you could encourage her to see an LC pronto.. and continue to push and push for their support!

Also- encourage her to hand express.. it's totally not fun.. but the stimulation is so so important!

[melchpeppi]

I am pretty sure that she is dedicated to breastfeeding, I dont know for sure though. Im hoping that we can visit this weekend, I just wanted to give her a chance to catch her breath after such a huge event...

He is off the ventilator now and only on another breathing device (is it a cpap or something? I really don't know *eek*) and doing really really well on his own :D. She was snuck down there to visit him (ummmm, the Drs told her she COULDNT SEE HER OWN BABY!) by the midwives so that is awesome too :D.

I cant wait to meet the little guy, and to offer some mama support *if she is open to it of course*.

[Snoozie]

Glad things seem to be going so well. :)

[cherish]

what! every mother has the right to be with their baby!! He will grow and improve in health if he is near his mum.. sorry- getting grumpy with stupid doctors/people..

[Rinelle]

That's shocking, that they wouldn't let her see her own baby? I spent some time in ICU when Ezri was there, and there were always people visiting their babies. Unless it was because she wasn't supposed to be moved herself?

We spent about 16 hours a day in ICU with Ezri. It was an incredibly trying time, so I hope your SIL's bub is strong enough to go home very quickly.

[melchpeppi]

Yes it was because she was recovering from the C-section and still had (and still has) pretty big issues relating to the PE :(. Im praying that she stabilizes soon.

Jasper stopped breathing last night, but they managed to get him breathing again, I dont know how he is today though. Its such an uphill struggle.

I hope we can see them soon. I am going to take in one of my wraps so she can do some discreet skin to skin (she is a private girl) - good old topless babywearing is always awesome!

[Kali]

Oh dear, I am just catching up on this. Big squishy hugs to her and Jasper. Congratulations on her birth. I hope everything improves for the two of them quickly.

[cherish]

oh dear.. poor bubba.. that makes sense with the PE thing.. poor darling.. I'm sure it's not how she envisioned becoming a mother- sending healing and hugs her way!

[melchpeppi]

Oh I know, I am worried about her - I know how disappointed and unfulfilled she may feel :(. I hope she isn't feeling that way but the reality is that she is most likely going to be feeling down :(.

[Rinelle]

*hugs* Be aware that the effects of this time will probably last much longer than this initial few weeks, hard as they will be. Even if you can't help much now, being someone to listen and understand down the track will be really important.

[Kali]

Having recently had an unexpected outcome of a pregnancy I can give you a couple of tips that helped me.
* Congratulate her and take her a normal baby gift (like a teddy, cute bib etc) Give her other more pressing stuff during the meeting not right at the start as soon as you see her.
* Tell her how beautiful her baby is, without mentioning the size etc. Tell her who you think the baby takes after. etc. Try to think of the normal conversation you would have when you are meeting a new baby.
*If you can ask to hold the baby, breathe the baby in.
*Take photos of the baby.
* Ask her how she is doing and really listen. Let her say "I'm fine" once and then press her for how she is really feeling again later.
* Listen, listen, listen. She will know that some of the things she is saying are irrational, you don't need to tell her or correct her. Just listen for as long as she needs to talk.
* Ask her if there is anything you can do (of course) but suggest, phoning people (the greatest gift given to me was a friend telling everyone for me), googling information ( I also have a google friend - interesting that both these people are on this forum :yes) or ringing organisations. Stuff she might find difficult doing in hospital or that might be emotionally too much at the moment.
* Find out how long the hospital will be providing meals for her and when they stop. Make her some lunches and dinners and snacks so she doesn't have to leave the hospital if she doesn't want to or if she goes home she doesn't have to worry about cooking.
*Ask if she has seen the hospital social worker. They can arrange for cheaper parking, better beds, talk to her medical team about her wishes, like kanga care or EBM from friends etc.
* Like Tamara said this is a long haul. When the honeymoon period of everyone being there is over, it gets a bit lonely. Be there for her in 3 months, 6 months etc as long as it takes her. Don't put a time frame on how long you think it will take her to "get over it".

You may not need any of these tips, but please take them in the spirit that they are given. I know you probably know most of the them already.

Hugs to her and to you.

[cherish]

good advice Kali.. I know that all of the above would have been helpful for me after the twins were born...

she will need to talk through it all.. probably over and over- where is she? I know here in Bris there is a support group called birthtalk where women are able to safely share the negative effects of their birth experience..

hugs darling!

[melchpeppi]

Kali that is WONDERFUL! BIL said that she will call me tonight, so I will take everything you have suggested on board (and use my listening ears :D).

[sunrisesister]

Awesome advice S...

Love and hugs to your friend Mel.. what a tough ride :(

[Aine]

its not uncommon for prem babes to stop breathing...the nurses give then a little wobble in ther crib and they are off again

[Stardust]

That is all great advice Kali. And, as a gift what about a journal she can write everything in (as well as a gift for the baby)? My friend who had a premmie at 27 weels said this was invaluable and such an amazing record to have now. Home cooked food is important also. Hospital fare is not that inspiring!
Love to all.

[Phoenix]

Usually SCN and ICN sell beautiful premmie baby diaries! They were $20 while I was there which is sadly a few years ago so I am not sure they still do it.

Great advice Kali! It is definately the little things that make it so much harder to feel 'normal'.

I hope you got to speak to SIL yesterday. I hope you get to see little Jasper very soon!