Teaching gratitude to younger children

[Esther]

I was just reading the other thread and just noticed it was in the teens section. I have trouble with this for my 7 year old. She has Autism so it is difficult to teach her things and she doesn't pick up what other kids her age do. Whenever we go out anywhere she wants a "present", argh. She watches tv and wants every toy that is in the ads no matter what it is, sigh.

Anyone got any suggestions? With other challenging moments, I have tried a few different things before finding what works for us.

[JAK]

Am trying hard not to laugh - you've just described my 11yr old with autism. Sorry that wasn't helpful was it.

With toys and when we go out, I get ds to tell me what he'd use the item for and how long he'd use it for. Then we go through what he already has at home. I have to say we still go through this years after implemented as he hasn't managed to get that thought process for himself. I'm hoping he's got it by the time he leaves home. Not sure if that was helpful either, sorry.

[Esther]

It's nice to know someone else has similar challenges :) I often feel like I am hitting my head against a brick wall or I have become a broken record.

I have tried teaching her that we only have a certain amount of money and we don't have enough money to buy everything. She has always been interested in money so this has some impact. The thing is she tries to justify why I can buy it for her. She has even offered to go and work, to earn money :laugh She is also extremely bright in an Autistic way. Often does my head in.

[Eilleen]

I have a gratitude journal. I write 5 things in it that I'm grateful for for that day. Then I read it aloud to my children (almost 7yrs and newly 5yrs) and sometimes, they choose to draw pictures to go with what I read out. (They draw the pictures at the bottom of my entry.)

Its not a direct way of teaching them gratitude...more showing them how grateful I am for specific things or specific events that we already have in our lives and to show them that I'm grateful for many things - and not just "things" things but general things like "I'm grateful that I was able to have a good long chat with my friends today".

During dinner time, we also play a "the best part of my day and what I'm grateful for" game. Basically we take turns to tell us what the best part of our day was and what we're grateful for.

Tonight, my daughter said: "the best part of my day was dancing with my friends. And I'm grateful that you [as in me] have cooked my favourite dinner."

My son said: "the best part of my day was eating chocolate, and I'm grateful that Jade gave me chocolate." :laugh :laugh you can see his priorities.

My friend also has an autistic son and he loves the "best part of day/grateful for" dinner game!

I think ritualising gratitude has many benefits.

[Ethereal]

A gratitude journal sounds nice :smile

I want to write a response but just can't find the words. It's late! So will come back to this.

[Karena]

I love the idea of that game E, so simple but a great way of teaching gratitude and also finding out about the children's day. I think I'll have to try that one.

Sorry not much help otherwise.

[MenkyFrog]

Love the game! We (DH and I) are going through a bit of a complicated separation-without-really-being-separated-no-one-knows-what-is-going-on-thing at the moment and it has interestingly created in DS1 (nearly9) an overwhelming desire to get "stuff". Also huge and uncharacteristic emotional outbursts. We made an agreement that we just would not buy stuff at all when we went to the shops BUT we could look for stuff that we liked and when we were at home we could talk about whether it was really something that would enhance our life.

Am trying really hard to make it a habit for them, particularly DS1 (and thus having to make it a habit for me - necessary :laugh) to not purchase anything straight away, rather to go home and think about it.

We will pick a person and look for something for them instead of looking for something for ourselves. and We also have very extensive Christmas lists for santa - we hand make each other's presents every year.